Bolts of Thunder news update

So all you cars out there that want me dead, you can forget about it! I'm at school right now which means that I once again survived a treacherous bike ride through the streets of Provo. Riding your bike in Provo is like playing a real life game of "Paperboy," the old Nintendo game. In riding these streets, you've gotta keep your whits about you. If you stop paying attention for one second, you risk an 18 year old retard on her cell phone behind the wheel of a BMW t-boning you and your bike into oblivion. I saw 3 of them this morning, and I threw my handy stash of protective newspapers, always readily available when riding my bike, at the cars to scare them off... So in Bolts of Thunder news, we have a softball team, "Bats of Thunder"! I have to give David Law credit for that name, he's the one that came up with it. We had our first game the other night, and my dad hit a home run. I'd expect nothing less from him. We have another game tomorrow morning, so if any supporters want to come cheer us on, field 4 at 9:30. See you there... Ok, now comes some pretty big bits of news: the official announcement of the date of the "Bolts of Thunder Gone Wild" video premier, and Bolts of Thunder's first wedding! My wedding... And I'm marrying a girl. Actually, it's Rachel, Bolts of Thunder's seamstress. It's like one of those office scandals where I've been hooking up with one of the other employees. Yeah, kind of like that. You heard right people, I'm tired of hiding who I really am for all these years. I can't stay shut up inside for ever, so I'm officially coming out of the tool shed and announcing to the world that I'm attracted to women. I have been my entire life. I hope you can understand my feelings and my decision and support me 100% in this matter. Rachel even requested that I insert a direct quote from her, "[Jon Hart is] gorgeous. A real man. A beautiful man. With perfect legs." That's a real quote, I swear I didn't make it up... So the video premier is going to be on August 12. We don't know where or what time, but we know that we are having it on that date. Then we've strategically planned the entire wedding around the video premier, so we're getting married the very next day, August 13. That way all the friends and family that have traveled so far for the video premier can stay for the wedding, if they so choose. It'll be kind of a video premier after-party of sorts... Anyway, now that the video deadline is out there, and it's only like 7 weeks away, you should expect to see Bolts of Thunder redoubling its efforts to bring you the finest in skateboarding... In announcing our wedding, I thought I'd put up our announcement/invitation picture. Thank you Matt for taking those, and thanks Hannah for being our stylist. So the first picture just barely pulled ahead of the runner up for official photo. The runner up, shown bellow, is still a pretty awesome picture. I was going for the old man pervert look while Rachel was going for the 4 year old sitting-on-Santa's-lap look. I think we both pulled it off pretty good. That's our big Bolts of Thunder news. So if you're a true Thunderbolt, you're invited to the video premier and the the video premier after party (the wedding reception). We're registered at Target... I added the pictures of Dan hugging a tree and Brian and me skateboarding just to give you a little somethin somethin to look at...