The Bank Job

So today's post has no picture, only text. Sorry to all you picture-book give me what I want when I want it generation, but that's just now how I was raised. So you know how you get those emails every now and then that ask you to join in the partnership of some African guy you've never met to get $10 million from his oil drilling? It's a scam, don't fall for it. So I got a couple of those this weekend and decided to respond back to them to tell them I'm interested. I want to know what their next plan of action is. So I just want to share with you one of my responses to them. If I hear back, I'm going to to post that and hopefully we'll get some good old fashioned drama from it. So here's what they had to say:

"Dear Sir, I would like to intimate you with the bank account of a deceased client of mine that I think would prove to be most interesting."

My response:

"Wo, you want to get bank intimate with me? I guess I'm not exactly opposed to it, but, well, you see, I guess I just haven't been bank intimate for some time now... I don't know if I remember how. But they say it's like riding a bike, it always comes back. The last time was when I got an email from Captain Zhairi Mukhabi from Ghana asking for my assistance in reclaiming his hard-earned diamond money. I told Captain that I would do it, but to be patient with me, for I was a bank-loving virgin; it was my first time. He said he'd be really gentle with me and promised not to hurt me. We met up at Wells Fargo on center street where Captain wanted to meet, and Captain turned out to be a 17 year old computer-hacking nerd that was just trying to scam me. He said that I wasn't the first either... I had never been so hurt nor let down before because he told me he loved me. He told me I was the only one. So I took him inside the bank and there we danced... I showed him the true meaning of bank intimacy by shoving a solid gold piece up his rectum and making him squeal like a pig. I guess this event turned him off to the whole idea of bank intimacy because I didn't hear back from him after. But I guess it's been a while now, and I've been wanting to get bank intimate again for some time now. But I will not be let down again, so if you even try it, I will come back for blood! So if you want to get intimate, let's get f---ing intimate!"

I await their response