The full frontal Dave assaults have not stopped as this week I received some more pictures of Dave destroying an across over off hubba on Matt's old school board. How he got the board, when he did these tricks, I know not. All I know is that Dave is not going to stop until he's grinded every square inch of grindable terrain on that old school board. However, from this week's pictures, I have been able to put together a large piece of the puzzle. Dave has apparently enlisted himself into some kind of concentration camp surrounded by fences and such. They obviously are not feeding Dave, they trimmed his beard, and they cut his hair, and from his lips they drew the Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah... So I think we're one step closer to finding out where Dave is and what's going on. Now we just need to locate all the concentration camps on the world and systematically go through each one, seeing what their skatepark facilities are like. I think that's how we could find him. Either way, Dave looks happy to be there and to have so much free time dedicated to skating...
Actually, looking at these pictures makes me think of a funny story. When we were in Paris this last summer, the last day we skated we went to this hubba down a double set that Dave tried to kill himself on. He rolled both of his ankles and jacked up his wrists trying to 5-0 and tailslide it. He tried until he was pretty much beaten into the ground and couldn't walk anymore, standard Dave fashion. At times like that, all you can do is try to console your friend and assure him that there will be sunny days in the future. You know, the sun will come out tomorrow. That kind of stuff. So I was filming on his camera, then I set his camera down for just a second to give Dave some moral support. We then picked up the camera and set it down at least two more times that I can remember because we filmed some more stuff. Somewhere in setting it down and picking it up again all these times, the bottom of the camera was covered in this massive bird dumpling. Seriously though, it wasn't your average bird crap, but it was huge. Like an ostrich or something had taken a dump there, there was tons of it. So Dave, after wrecking himself, filmed me grind down that hubba, and he put the camera on his lap to film. After we watched the footage, we all noticed that we had stuff on our hands. We looked closer and saw that it was bird crap, and it was all over the place. It was on all of our hands, all over Dave's pants, in the deep recesses and crevices of Dave's camera, everywhere. I didn't know birds could crap so much. This was the final beating to an already beaten Dave. After he wrecked himself trying to get his trick, he got himself covered in bird crap.
Seeing that we were in France, public bathrooms are an extreme rarity, so we had nowhere to wash our hands or anything. We used pieces of school paper we found on the play ground and wiped up the camera as best as we could then just got on the metro back to where we were staying, completely covered in bird crap. It didn't help that we were over an hour away from where we had to go, it was like 10 at night and we had been skating all day every day for a couple weeks and were completely exhausted, and the metros can get really cramped at times, so we were likely wiping bird crap all over the seats and on other people. Whatever, when in France, do as the French do. We were sure to leave our mark on that city and country by the spread of harmful bacteria throughout the subway. I guess it was the most fitting way to end our trip over there, and it's just really funny now that I look back on it...
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