Garrett and Shereen

So this post is dedicated to Garrett and Shereen Taylor. They are husband and wife, hence the same last name. When Matt and I decided to go to France this summer, we told and invited everyone so we'd have a fun posse over there. Understandably, a trip to France was not in most of our friends' time and budget constraints, so they had to respectfully decline our invitations. I told Garrett about it, and he sounded interested, so I emailed him our flight info so he knew when we were going. Then I didn't hear anything from him after that for about a week, and I figured it was just a fool's dream thinking we'd have any other friends come with us (besides Dan, he almost bought his tickets within the hour that I told him we wanted to go, before we even knew the exact dates. I talked him into waiting for a week before he bought the tickets so we could work out everything first. Dan, I like your enthusiasm...) Much to my surprise, about a week or so later on March 9, I received a text from Garrett that said, "Hey we got tickets to france i emailed our flight info." That was it, and just like that. I could hardly believe it, so I called him up and called him out on his bluff. Turned out he wasn't bluffing, and sure enough, Garrett and Shereen flew into Paris two days after Matt and me (I thought it was the next day that they were flying in. Matt and I spent 3 frustrating hours searching and scouring through the Paris Charles de Gaulle airport before a worker pointed out to me that we were there a day early. I felt stupid, but I don't feel stupid anymore...). I will just come straight out and say this right now, Garrett and Shereen were the perfect duo to have with us in Paris. Seriously, I can't think of any other wife that would be willing to come skate with us for 12 hours straight in Paris while she could have been spending all her time in museums and stuff. Not that they didn't sight see, but she spent a solid 2 weeks skating all over Paris with us. And when I say skating, I really mean that she was riding around on a skateboard with us. And when I say riding around, I don't mean Garrett was helping her balance on her board or something, I mean we had to try our best to keep up with her as she weaved in and out of dense Parisian sidewalk traffic. She was the first to hop on her board when we were in the subways in Paris, she'd throw down and take off, and we'd all have to throw down behind her and catch up. It reminded me of a video game where you have to follow some guy that leads you to a helicopter wreck so you can save the wounded, or he shows you how to get to the next level or something; no matter how fast you go or how hard you try to keep up, you just get glimpses of them as you go around a corner and they're already rounding the next one. I just looked for long red hair blowing around in the hallway, and I followed that. I think I got the perfect idea of how cool it would be with Shereen around when I picked them up from the airport and she ran through the train ticket controller section with another person while Garrett and I were trying to buy tickets to get through. She had all the money, so we ended up having to run through with her. I'd say that that started off our trip on the right foot. I can't think of any other friend's wife I know that could pull that off for a couple weeks straight. AS a random side note, I was just solicited by a character of a John Grisham novel, came to Matt's front door with books to sell... Back to Garrett and Shereen. So I've known Garrett since I was 17. The first time I met him, he looked like a lost dog skating with a bunch of my friends. He saw a bunch of us skating on the side of the road and he came to skate with us. I recognized an unfamiliar face and went up to talk to him, and we've been really good friends ever since. I even had the honor of being one of his groomsman at his wedding which gave me the opportunity to have a dance-off with one of his grandma's workers at her soap factory. I will have you know that I've never had so much on the line during that dance, and I've never danced harder. I won... I've been on more road trips with Garrett than anyone else besides Matt, and we've never had any kind of argument or anything. I've never gotten mad at him, been annoyed with him, or been sick of hanging out with him. True story. That's how laid back and cool he is. Garrett spent 90% of his time in Paris with a camera strapped around his neck, filming cars, people, buildings, and birds. I've got pictures to prove it... Something funny I learned about Garrett on this trip, Garrett can't smile on demand. Something has to happen that makes him laugh in order for him to give a genuine smile. Any time he had to pose and smile, he got this creepy joker smile that scared us all. So we'd try and do something to lighten things up and make him laugh. I put in two pictures above of him and Shereen smiling together. The first is a posed smile, the second is a real smile. Now you can see the difference... Garrett and Shereen, we're super glad you guys came, and Garrett, we're ready to film you some more for your part in the up and coming "Bolts of Thunder Gone Wild" video.

Pimps on a Train

"It's just weird, when a girl looks you in the eye and you know she cares about you and loves you. Then you find out she's a hooker." -Dan Shaw. Bolts of Thunder would like to take this time to publicly announce two things. First of all, we renounce all forms of prostitution and pimping. We learned from our train ride and stay in Nice that pimps are lowlife creepy dirty people, and they take advantage of women. We didn't know that before our trip. I worked for 4 months in Geneva with a women's rights organization, so it was sad to see these women being taken advantage of. So women, don't prostitute yourselves. And men, don't pimp out women or pay for their services. Just get a spouse and love him/her the good old fashioned way, and everyone will be happier. Seriously. Second of all, Bolts of Thunder would like to publicly thank Margaret for her hospitality and generosity for us in Paris. She was more than willing to let all of us sleep in her apartment, use her cell phone for the entire time, show us around the place, direct us on the metros, wait up for us to let us in the door, eat her food, and a million other things. She was awesome. And she makes a mean (in mean I mean tasty) omelet. I don't want to create confusion for any readers out there. I said earlier that Garrett and Margaret's dog had waged a methane propelled war on each other while we were there. While this is true, this in no way reflects Margaret's treatment towards us while we were there. We ended on good terms with the dog when we left, and all is well in Paris. Anyway, thanks again Margaret!!!!! You'll definitely get free Bolts of Thunder merchandise... Speaking of Bolts of Thunder merchandise, I want to draw your attention to the top right section of the blog. There's a new tab that says "merchandise" and under it, you can click on "shirts". Se we're going to organize all the merchandise we make so that if you ever want anything, you can make a request on the page! When we get other things besides shirts, we'll put them up. We will have to charge you for the merchandise though, but it will only be the cost of the materials themselves. The labor is free. So we're not pocketing any money by asking you to pay, you're pretty much paying for a blank shirt, and we're decorating it for you. We're getting in some blank shirts soon and we'll make a bunch of stuff with them, so stay tuned in the merchandise section.

Quick Nick update

Just thought I'd put up a quick Nick update. My boy was on the injured list for a couple weeks, but we're proud to announce that he is back on his board and showing the world what it means to be high life, ambition, and not illegal drugs. He came out to American Fork over the weekend and gave that park a taste of frontside air with a dash of passion like a true Bolts of Thunder OOG (old original gangster, a phrase coined by Nick himself). And so you know, his new baby girl Collette and wife Kim are doing great after the birth, and we're starting up our new line of Bolts of Thunder baby clothing. Pictures to follow shortly...

Bigfoot sightings

Some time ago, headquarters warned us of an unknown follower of our blog, Tyler Braithwaite (I think I spelled his name right). The fact that someone we had never met was bold enough to publicly declare himself a follower of the Bolts of Thunder blog blew our minds and sent the editorial department of our blog spiraling into doubt and paranoia. We believed Tyler to be a Pakistani spy posing as a local skater in an attempt to infiltrate our blog and steal our secrets. Kind of like how they got their nuclear weapons. In short, we didn't think Tyler to be a real person. But this weekend we headed off for an adventure at the American Fork park, and we had what we believe to be a real Tyler Braithwaite sighting! So the legend just might be real. Tyler might not be a Pakistani double agent trying to get our secrets, but a normal skater kid from Provo after all... Just to be sure, we secretly collected hair samples from him when he wasn't looking, and our scientists are still processing them to see if they are truly Tyler DNA. Also, I secretly snapped off a couple pictures of him just to show all of you viewers that he, Tyler, may in fact be real. And from what we seen, he's got a mean switch varial heelflip...

we survived the apocalypse

So this post is coming to you post judgment day, May 21, 2011. I was curious how judgment day was going to come to pass because the guy said it was going to be at 6:00 PM. Would judgment come to each time zone separately at 6:00 PM? You know, in localized areas. Or was the wrath going to be poured out according to California's time zone, since they're the most wicked over there? Questions that need answering... But thanks to great organizations such as Bolts of Thunder that support strong moral values, the world wasn't ripe enough for the Apocalypse. So we're back in Utah now, and I have much to do to get organized again. But we will have a bunch more pictures of our trip coming up soon, and whatever other random crap I can think of. So stay tuned, you apocalypse surviving Thunder Bolts you...

Mama, mama I'm coming home...

This post is just to tell all you player haters out there that we're coming back. To the states. We were in Paris and Italy for a couple weeks, if you didn't know that... Today was our last day here, and Matt, Dave, and I spent it skating. Not just skating, but slamming on stuff, getting worked, getting footage, and rolling around in bird poop. No, I take that back, bird diarrhea. We managed to get it all over ourselves, I don't even know how. But last I saw Dave, it was on his pants in at least 2 different spots, on Matt's hands, on my finger, and on our cameras. That bird did it on purpose, and he got us good. Maybe the animal kingdom is striking back after Garrett farted on that wiener dog. But I would have thought the animals had even things out when the dog pissed on Garrett this morning?... Complicated stuff. So Paris has the most amazing spots everywhere that are so much fun to skate but are covered with people and kids, which makes them hard to skate. It's like if you drop soda on the ground and ants swarm to it, people can sense how sweet marble ledges are, and they swarm to them, getting all up in your face and sometimes in your grill. Another thing about Paris, every square inch of this city is saturated in human urine. Not joking. So after not having showered for a week, I feel disgusting and am ready to go home. But we've had so much fun here, it was rad to meet up with all our friends and have such a good time. We'll have plenty of pictures and stories for some time to come, so keep yourselves posted. See you in the States!

Garrett vs the Wiener Dog

I don't know that I've ever seen a grown man have a nervous breakdown until I saw Garrett declare war on a 15 pound wiener dog. 2 weeks of cramped living conditions wore on my friend, but he was pushed over the edge by the constant vomiting, farting, pissing, and pooping of the little dog in our tight living quarters. Garrett hit his boiling point last night when the dog farted in front of Garrett, sending him spiraling over the cliff of insanity into a realm of heat, passion, and revenge. Garrett retaliated by squatting down over the dog's face and releasing a bear's growl on the little tike. The dog actually seemed to enjoy it, it showed no signs of animosity, anger, or revenge. But don't be deceived by cute little wiener dogs people, they have the memory of an elephant, and they will never leave you with the score in your favor. After that, Garrett wandered back and forth in the apartment, smelling the inside's of our skating shoes, squirming at the effects, spraying them with febreeze, then shoving them in everyone's face and saying, "smell these! they're disgusting!!!" Yeah, he had lost it... Well, this morning, the little dog showed just how determined it is to run Garrett out of the country. The dog sleeps in the master's bedroom, and we sleep in the living area/kitchen. At the first sound of movement out in the living room, the master opened the door, releasing an angered wiener dog on an unsuspecting and unprepared group of tourists. The dog zeroed in on Garrett, passing up Matt and Shereen as it jumped onto the bed, peed on Garrett, then jumped off. A true veteran in the art of getting even. Quick, precise, and deliberate. We put the dog outside where it's probably eating grass just so it can throw up on the floor later, just to spite Garrett. We have temporarily declared a cease fire between Garrett and the dog while each side specifies its demands. The dog has made it quite clear though, it wants us out... Oh yes, and to respond to a follower's comment a couple posts ago, we will start selling Bolts of Thunder merchandise as soon as I'm back in the US. We will charge the cost of the materials, that's it. If you want any kind of Bolts of Thunder merchandise, make a special request on the blog or in person, and we'll get on it pronto. That's how we roll...